Lost...

I have been feeling very lost and confused lately - and not at all like myself.  When I say that, I then wonder who it is I haven't been.  Who am I?  This has been my struggle for some time now, as the sense of self I previously had seems to have become slightly obscured and blurred into the background a bit.  The main effect all of this has been having on me is that I go about my days feeling a huge void inside...an emptiness....loneliness.

Sure, I will laugh and can easily be happy on the outside, but it's not long before the mists of emptiness return.

The sad thing for me is that I know deep down I have a lot to give - lots of good, loving energy to spread around, but how can I do that when right now I'm not really liking myself all that much!  The problem is that when I lose my way I start becoming affected by typical, negative human emotions.  Sure I can still appear friendly and loving towards people, but somehow I just don't "feel" it inside like I normally do - it's like I'm some kind of imposter, putting on an act (but not really doing it intentionally..if that makes any sense!) and I get grumpy...really grumpy :(

Right now, as I type this, I know that I just want to immerse myself back into the spiritual "headspace" (for want of a better word) I was in before all of this, because it's like a beautiful, warm, cosy blanket that feels so protective, peaceful and amazing.  I just don't know what is stopping me......

......although I did receive something this morning which has been quite beneficial to me already and it's what I needed just at the right time.  It's given me the faith to know I will eventually see my way again and I will be a better reflection on the outside of what I know exists somewhere on the inside.

I just have to find myself again.

Love, light, blessings and fairy magic xo